The train to Exeter St Davids

Every relationship that I have ever had (with the exception of Danielle), has gone on for at least six months longer than it should. Once I’d decided that enough was enough, I could never quite find the right time to tell them. As a result, I would get to the point where I didn’t want to be anywhere near them, and when I told them, it came out badly. Will’s sister is the only past-acquaintance that still speaks to me.

When I left for university, my girlfriend at the time was studying at Exeter. I’d assumed and hoped that our separation would be the beginning of the end for us. Unfortunately, she didn’t feel the same. So, every other week, I would take the train to see her (she even paid half the fare!), and I would while away the first part of the journey by planning my exit.

I would get off the train, take her for a coffee, tell her that we were over, and then get on the next train home.

That was my plan, but after four hours in a sweaty carriage, I couldn’t face the return journey, and within an hour of arriving we would be in bed together playing our own version of choo-choo trains.

I repeated this for a year until I couldn’t stand it any longer, and I did what all good cowards do. I wrote her a letter. If that wasn’t bad enough, it included the following passage.......

I think our relationship has come to a logical conclusion.

For some reason, that sentence made her particularly cross. Luckily, I didn’t want my hoodie or my T-shirts back.